Tonight our oldest twin tearfully refused a bath for fear that her “fingernails might come off”. They were freshly painted yesterday by her Nanny…I knew what she meant. You have to pick your battles. These days, it seems I’m losing the ones I pick but whatever. She’s asleep now…dirty hair; fingernails intact.
Now that they are all sleeping (husband included), I thought I’d take a moment and offer a few updates.
I talked with the bride. Turns out she’s a really gracious and forgiving person. Good thing. I guess I already knew that, but it’s still a relief to have talked with her and offer my appropriate apologies for my lack of…well, just for my lack. I’d post a photo from her wedding here, but I wasn’t there. So this is me. Moving on. Starting now.
The movie we were waiting for? Well, it came. They were scared of the Beast, but held out hope until he turned nice. And we had a real movie night (or day, really). It is so refreshing to watch something other than Dora. I was pleased to discover I remembered so many of the songs after 15 years or so. Two girls weren’t so pleased. I think “Shhhh, Mommy. We can’t hear” was the exact phrase. At least it’s in English.
And then there is my daily struggle with Good Mom. If only she would disappear into the archives like that blog post did. But she doesn’t. Instead she hovers, lingering in my days the same way the smell of a dirty diaper lingers in the room after it has been taken to the trashcan outside. She weaves her way into my thoughts and leaves me feeling helpless to ever becoming more like her. Turns out Good Mom may be a good mom, but she isn’t a very good friend.
I remember the words the Lord speaks to me, gentle and true. He brings life and hope and clarity.
And He doesn’t hover. I like that.
Ahh, good update. Your sweet, humble point of view is far superior to Good Mom’s- and besides, she has to worry about Super Mom.
Oh Emily, your blog is a bright spot in my life. I love when I check it and there is a new post! And, you my dear, are “Good Mom” in my book . . . We all strive to be perfect, and of course, that will never be. But from what I see, you are not too far behind. Thanks for the wonderful writing and sharing your “every day” with the rest of us. Always.
Good mom is a meanie and I don’t like her. She’s so jugdemental. I like Real mom the best.
Thanks Emily, your realness lets me exhale more deeply about my day and the burdens I put on myself. I hadn’t read your “Good mom” post before. I love the knife in the dishwasher for two weeks. I just took out a bowl from the dishwasher that had caked on scrambled eggs that I kept rewashing for about week. I finally had to scrubbed it.
Em, I’m so glad that you are real in your posts. You are better than a “Good mom” you are a REAL mom and your kids will learn so much more from you. Echoing Meredith’s comment, our closet curtain fell down a week ago and it’s still on the floor in front of the closet. I just continue to step over it or on it to hang up clothes and put shoes away. It’s amazing how 5 min. jobs like this can sit for months, unfinished. So I feel like such a failure. OH WELL!!! C’est la vie!
Isn’t crazy how something like that screams “failure” at us? When I read it from you it’s so obvious it isn’t true. But when its me…well, let’s just say that’s another story.