There are these little people who live with us – little tiny people with great big wills. And they walk around the house, living their little lives out loud, the joys and the sorrows expressed in equally high-pitched squeals.
They don’t always do things the way I would like. In fact, most of the time they do things extremely other-than the way I would like. Sometimes I’m surprised at their choices. Other times I have to remember they’ve only been around for six years or so.
Sometimes I want to lock them in this house at the age they are right now, surrounded by the safe that I think I control. If they mess up, I’m here. I see it. I can guide and correct. And even though I lose my cool sometimes, I’m still their Mommy and I know what’s best, right?
And in saying it, I am taken back to the beginning of time when our Creator put two trees in the Garden: one for fruit, the other forbidden. He could have just made the good one so we wouldn’t have a chance to wreck it all up. He was not afraid to give us a choice right from the start.
He was not afraid, eventhough He knew what would happen.
Love continues to surprise me.
Love is a strange, mysterious and wonderful thing!
Emily,
You are giving me a good word of encouragement at the end of this rather rough day with my wee-wats. Thank you!
Indy lives life large and out loud (special emphasis on the loud). There are days when it makes me totally insane, but I wouldn’t trade a minute of it.
This is a good, no, excellent word.
Control freak that I am I found that the raising of the little ones is the easy part. It’s the part when they grow up and move out on their own and make those decisions that leave you scatching your head that’s the scary part. The Lord used that to break me from the control issue (mostly). They have to make their own decisions. AND they are still HIS. He’s capable of taking care of them the best way possible. He knows just what they and we need.
Sorry for the long comment.
I read that this morning during Sam’s second breakfast. The choice always weirds me out, thankfully mostly in a good way.
Motherhood has made me realize how not in control I am. A little hard but the best lesson ever. God’s grace and guidance get me through the times now. I think it is training for me to depend on Him right now while they are only 8 and 4. I will need to be on my knees when they hit middle school and high school… but I know He is in control of what is to come.
I get this post…I am amazed at high much better I understand the love of our Heavenly Father the more engrossed I find myself in parenting. Your words are beautiful!
Though not yet a mother, I am certainly a control freak. Too many times that part of me has demanded its way in my marriage. But I’m learning that love is patient, and that’s what gives the strength to allow choice. Love is indeed full of surprises.
Is it wrong that after reading this lovely post all I want to say is, “Nothing runs like a Deere, baby!”
Hee hee, it must be the “mother of boys” in me!
My kids, my husband, my friends, so many times I could say “that’s not the way I’d have done it” but amazingly and much to my chagrin the way they did it is better than how I would! I would have loved to stop everyone in their tracks about 2 years ago and kept them that age forever, God has other plans!
Great post…i too would love to keep my kids at the age they are now..they are perfection!
Amazing that you know what I’ve been dealing with and we haven’t even met! My son, a high school senior, keeps making choices that are NOT what I think is best. I keep telling myself God has big plans for him and he’s a “late-bloomer”. Thanks for the encouraging words!
I love what context you put this in, it shows parenting in a whole new light
It occurred to me recently that this whole parenting gig is about letting go. From the moment they are born, we are letting them go in small ways that eventually turn to great big ways. If I didn’t know that God is so incredibly faithful I don’t think I could obey that little whisper, “Let go.” Even so, it isn’t always easy especially now that they are older and the stakes are seemingly much greater. I guess if God wasn’t afraid of what would happen then I don’t need to be either. He can handle it- whatever it is. That’s my peace.
Excellent point! God knew what would probably happen…but He let our forefathers make choices and see the consequences. And He continues to do so for us. What an awesome Father we have, and how much we can learn from Him! Interesting to note that He forgives, but He doesn’t always take away the consequences for our sins…
The volume knob is often on 10 within my little miss as well. I was blessed with one boy and one girl…let’s just say God knew who i needed first! LOL! As for the tremendous unconditional love of God, it constantly astounds me! We only feel a pinch of how much He loves us when we love our own children…whoa!! I am so unworthy…love abounds…Thank you, Lord!
Emily, I love your heart! You often get me in touch with my own.
How beautiful it is that our children teach us more about Christ’s love than we ever imagined!
Sheesh I needed this! Just today, Little Miss Sophia has cut another chunk of her hair out…I’ve been finding hair all over the house all day. So glad she has a ton of hair. She has gotten into my sewing stuff and refuses to take naps or stay in her room at night (for about 4 days straight). I’m feeling kind of warn out…actually having a little ‘time out’ as we speak.
Great post Emily.
So thankful that God loves us still, regardless of our choices.
He is such a wise, loving, perfect parent. I look back from this empty nest and know that He was there even when I was far from perfect. I see the imprint of His grace on the lives of my grown children and am more thankful than I can possibly say.
As a control-ish mother, choice terrifies me. Maybe it’s because I’ve chosen wrong more times than I care to admit. And then I think about how God has redeemed the bad choices, how I have learned from them, how that is likely the only way I would really learn what I needed to. He is bigger than my bad choices…
But for my own flesh and blood, I am still not so crazy about choice.
As always, you’ve given me good stuff to ponder.
all that they said … and I love love love the picture.
Great thought. Always love reading what you have to say. Can’t wait for your book to come out
The perfect Parent. I have so much to learn from him.
Love doesn’t try to control, it simply loves, regardless of the choice. (Still learning that one)
Thank you for sharing. To me…this is the dilemma I’ve gone through in making the decision to homeschool or not. We currently are not. It has been a learning experience for both me and the girls. We deal with things as they come and pray to make good choices. Who knows what we’ll be doing next year. But we’re here now.
I love this Emily.
Love your honest and inspiring posts from one mom to another!
Wanted to pass on this award to you because you rock!
http://homewiththeboys.blogspot.com/2010/01/fantastic-followers-friday-and-award.html
This post made me stop in my tracks. How have I studied Adam and Eve in all kinds of Bible studies over the years, but never thought of this? The trust God put in us, even though he knew we would break that trust, is overwhelming. New perspective on parenting, that’s for sure! Thank you Emily.
Carrie
I have a 4 year old son. I’ll just say, I needed to read this. Thank you for writing it.
Love this. Thanks!
As Logan would say….”who says that your way is the best way….?” so true. I want to trust God more with her…. She belongs to Him anyway…. not me….i’m just His teapot to pour into her….She is so amazing to me! I think of this song when I think of her…
‘THE WORDS I WOULD SAY’….
Be strong in the Lord and never give up hope…you’re gonna do great things…I already know…God’s got His hand on you so don’t live life in fear…forgive and forget…but don’t forget why you’re here….take your time and pray…and thank God for each day…HIs love will find a way…these are the words I would say…..
Oh this is beautiful. True love in it’s rarest form: FREEDOM. Thanking Jesus for the risk He took in loving us.
What a beautiful and honest post from the heart, Emily. I love the part about wanting to lock your children up and keep them in your control…I just wrote about this exact topic in my post “Please Don’t Go” two days ago. My daughter is about to turn five and for some reason, five is hitting me hard. She will go to Kindergarten (in EIGHT months and I am already getting butterflies – yes, I need to get a life…) in the fall and the thought of starting to surrender control is chipping away at my heart.
Thanks for a great post!
still pondering this…four days after first reading the words. this mother of three rapidly-growing smalls (who, too, live their lives out loud at both ends of the spectrum – so loved that description!) is led to the following and the repetition of the word alone. “alone” here, is laden with unsurpassable hope and comfort:
Let all that I am wait quietly before God,
for my hope is in him.
He alone is my rock and my salvation,
my fortress where I will not be shaken.
My victory and honor come from God alone.
He is my refuge, a rock where no enemy can reach me.
O my people, trust in him at all times.
Pour out your heart to him,
for God is our refuge
Selah
(Psalm 62:5-8)
I don’t know if I could add an appropriately meaningful comment to this post. All I can say, from the bottom of my heart, is thank you! You’ve given me something incredible to ponder over after a rather difficult day with my little guy.
I believe this is my favorite post every. I can so relate!
I adore you and your gift of writing.