this tuesday. unwrap.

Mothering is on my mind this week. If feels a little like cheating since Sunday was Father’s Day. In what is perhaps the exact opposite perspective from my post yesterday, I’ve been considering time and the passing of it. Instead of dwelling on the difficult, I’ve been thinking how my little tiny baby girl lost her first tooth on the last day of kindergarten. My other little and tiny baby girl started reading books to herself rather than needing me to read them to her. My even littler and tinier baby boy turned four and is getting too heavy to carry. They are little and they are tiny.

But not really.

Being a sentimental sap means I take photos to remember and I record to relive. In fact, we do it here together on Tuesdays. But I have to be careful.

Sometimes enjoying this moment skirts dangerously close to longing for the days that were before. My feeler gets the best of me and I am swallowed up in a sea of sentiment until it feels as though I might drown in the sorrow of life moving on. That sorrow, though evidence of a tender heart, is able to steal the moments of this day, the ones the Lord has made. To embrace the day I have rather than long for those other days is one of the most difficult challenges of my mother heart. Remembering the then threatens to overwhelm my now with a swirly mix of sentiment and regret. I didn’t hold them enough, enjoy them enough, pray enough.

We are given this day to live and breathe and move around in. Grace is lavished. Mercy overwhelms. Love holds us together. Today.

Is there a gift waiting in a quiet place? Is there a moment you would like to unwrap here with us? The guidelines for Tuesdays Unwrapped are here. In summary, link up with the permalink to your unwrapped post, or your link will be deleted. I would also ask, as a courtesy, that you would please link back here to Chatting at the Sky by either using the button or a text link somewhere in your post. Thank you.

tuesdays unwrapped at cats

Comments

  1. says

    so true, so true. it’s a very delicate balance. last night i rocked with asher for a minute, and he was out. and i just savored those few moments rocking him. because literally, there are probably only a few times that i will ever get to do that again. i mean, sure, maybe a handful, but you know…not a lot!! anyway, love you, and have so much fun this week. ;)
    Melissa´s last blog post ..Grand Opening and Hearts Beaming

  2. says

    Emily,

    This is something I have struggled with since my twin boys were 10 days old (oh no…they’re double digit days now)! I am a nut! Anyway, I don’t like to reference my own blog in my comments, but I’m breaking my rule this time because I wrote something on my struggles with this topic a few weeks ago:

    http://www.momssharpeningmoms.com/2010/05/on-growing-kids-and-hurting-neck.html

    Here’s to enjoying our babies in the here and now!
    Kristen-Moms Sharpening Moms´s last blog post ..Sometimes it is not good for your "cup to runneth over"

  3. says

    I hear you today, sweetheart. Only it’s not my mother’s heart that’s facing this predicament right now–it’s my bride’s heart.

    Today–this very day–is my silver anniversary. Oh, gosh. How did that happen?

    But I am resolved to savor this day and press on–to do what my husband is calling “starting the second half of our marriage”–rather than spend all my time wishing I could do the first half over.

    God bless you, my friend.
    Richella´s last blog post ..Silver

  4. says

    Hi Emily. :) Love the way you captured the mommy heart struggle in this post. I’m right there with you, living a seemingly parallel life. So nice to know we are not alone on this planet.

  5. says

    Oh, I have so been lost in the “good old days” lately with graduation and college prep. Thanks for the reminder that these are also the “good old days”. I’ve taken the time to look back and revel and now it’s time to look forward and celebrate the wonderful big persons my little people turned out to be.
    Bonita´s last blog post ..A Book You Don’t Want to Miss

  6. says

    Drown in the sorrow of life moving on.
    Yes. I’m always floundering in those waves, and I write about it constantly.
    Thank you for this beautiful and evocative reminder that we ought not squander what is right here with this sorrow. It’s really hard for me, and I am grateful for the tug back to now.

  7. says

    ‘Sentimental sap’….giggle.
    Me too. A song can sometimes bring me to tears, the smell of a new baby puts me in a spin, so get used to it sweetie, it’s gonna last forever. It’s part of our makeup. I’m about to hit 64 and still get that ‘baby blue’ feeling. Oh argh!
    I think it’s all a part of the plan. Those sappy feelings, wishing for the ‘good ole days’, release a chemical that allows us to go on when we get so fed up and tired of ‘today’, and so we can see that someday, today will be the one we yearn for.
    Keeps us off balance, just enough so that we have to really wave our arms about to stay upright. Life is a hoot, isn’t it.
    Love every bit.
    Blessed be friend.
    linda´s last blog post ..Growing Wild

  8. Gretchen N. says

    I love reading your blog because I always leave so encouraged. It’s good to know that I’m not the only one struggling w/these feelings. You put into words exactly what I’m thinking. Mothering is so rewarding, but it’s hard work and it’s good to know we’re not alone :)

    Gretchen N. (Oh and my husband’s a youth pastor, too!!)

  9. says

    Yes, you captured so well the tendency of our hearts to look back through the years with longing and sorrow. Yet you are right that we need to keep that in perspective. In a few years, right now will be the day we’re looking wistfully back to. Making the best of today will give us the blessing of more good memories to sigh over :)
    Beth West´s last blog post ..Update

  10. says

    yes… today is important. other days i will wish for waht was… but not today. today is all ist own. thank you for this beautiful reminder.

  11. says

    Your post yesterday is one of my favorites. Funny how we seem to get amnesia as time passes. I seem to go back and forth between the mentality behind yesterday’s post and today’s, between the “this is so hard” moments and “oh how I miss those sweet days and I should have done so much differently and better.” You always give me wise reminders to rest in the gifts of today…which is why I love to camp out here.
    The Scooper´s last blog post ..Because Sometimes A Lens Isn’t Just a Lens…

  12. says

    This morning Thomas gave me a normal, closed lip kiss for the first time. You know how when they are babies, you get those wide, open mouth kisses….can you believe he is doing this to me?!?!?
    Amy´s last blog post ..Great Expectations

  13. says

    I REALLY appreciate this post. I am guilty of looking at my kids and remembering their little days. I see the more grown up problems they have now and it saddens me. But this post, honestly, I’d never thought of it way…
    misty´s last blog post ..Summer, Summer, Summer-TIME…

  14. says

    As a mother of a two year old and a one year old, I SO appreciate this post and yesterday’s post (which made me cry). Thank you for keeping it real. Sometimes people act like I should be wrapping every second with these little people in gold and bronzing their old toothbrushes and dirty diapers. So maybe I should? But maybe I should be living in the NOW.
    LOVE IT! You’ve helped me through my case of the mondays!

  15. angie w says

    i am right there also. sometimes the feelings of not having been “enough” is overwhelming. thanks for stating it so well.

  16. Sissy says

    You totally need to take the time to read my post. It will make you laugh and everyone can use a laugh!

    Hope the kids enjoyed Phoebe yesterday and all her kisses! It was good to see you and I hope the next week or two brings you some rest.

  17. says

    Oh, it is so easy to get all goopy and sentimental and forget what joy and gifts we have today. This unwrapping, for me, is a reminder to pull myself forward, into this very moment, today, with boys and girl all much bigger than is possible, and find the joy. This is the gift you give me each week. :)
    Erin´s last blog post ..Of Father’s Day, Failure, and Front Teeth

  18. says

    Out of my soon-to-be 21 yr old, oh the rememberance of wild, wacky toddler fun, I too get caught up in the days gone past. And the void of regrets can pull and I’m so thankful He is able to turn it all for good. I love what you said: “We are given this day to live and breathe and move around in. Grace is lavished. Mercy overwhelms. Love holds us together. Today.” Grace and mercy, yes even for myself.
    Tammy@If Meadows Speak…´s last blog post ..The Exodus Life–When Freedom Is A Journey

  19. maggie says

    I have been living most of my life this way. I remember mourning my childhood, and I was still living it. I especially feel it now with my baby boys. What you wrote will live in my heart always. You opened your self and let me in and I found something familiar. Something like fear and and overwhelming love. I hope you don’t mind if I print this post and save it in my journal.
    thank you for saying what I have been feeling.

  20. says

    You so perfectly capture my almost daily struggle. I try to remind myself that in a few years I will be looking back at THIS time in my life RIGHT NOW, wishing I had lived in the moment more. So now’s the time to stop the vicious cycle! And of course there is such great comfort in knowing I’m not the only one. :)

    Great words! Thank you.
    Ashley´s last blog post ..Life is a hotdog

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