Laura is currently hacking out a life overseas in Thailand, where her husband directs a Christian orphanage for girls. She is homeschooling their three small children, loving 44 Asian orphans, and navigating markets that sell fried grasshoppers. After ten years in church ministry, she is learning that practical obedience in a foreign country is much less romantic than the missionary novels she read as a kid. She writes of lessons learned and blunders made at her blog, Laura Parker {Life Overseas}. You can also follow her on twitter.
We each hold a kid’s hand as we navigate the Asian marketplace. It’s a sweltering mangle of vendors with knock-off sunglasses and the smell of freshly-dead fish and the bodies of nearly-everyone within a scooter-ride’s distance from this parking-lot turned Thai-Walmart-on-steroids. And I start to feel sorry for myself. I’m frustrated at the effort it takes to just get dinner in a foreign land, and I’m annoyed by the heat and the crowds. I grumble about the smells that turn my stomach and the weight of my three-year-old strapped to my back.
And then my shoulder bumps him. Shuffling on cautious feet. Fingers doggedly striking an oddly-tuned keyboard slung around a brown neck. Tin can taped to the side of the scratched instrument. Eyes glazed-blue, deformed, and seeing only darkness.
And compassion stirs. I scramble for coins to clink into the can, and I touch his hand so he’ll know. And I walk away wondering about what it must be like to navigate a busy marketplace, by yourself, without sight, begging for the money to buy dinner.
And, suddenly, I feel pretty small to be complaining at all.
Ever since our family of five moved to Thailand several months ago, poverty and injustice have been daily visitors. We read the histories of the girls at the orphanage my husband directs, and we are struck with the reality of childhood prostitution. We see the dirty-faced boy selling flowers on our busy street corner, and poverty stands right outside our car window. I hear first-hand accounts of abuse in neighboring countries, and I watch my husband travel into remote villages where rice is the only food in the bowl. I bump into a blind musician at a busy market, begging for pennies.
Insulated. My life six months ago was vastly different; it whispered insulation at every turn. Living a middle-class lifestyle in a quaint mountain community in Colorado, I was enjoying the American Dream. My hands were overflowing with freedoms and conveniences and privileges. I had become so naturally insulated from the less fortunate around me that subtle attitudes of entitlement and discontent quietly became the normal. I never fully realized what I had been given, and so the desire for more and better reared its head all too often.
And then I moved halfway around the world.
Gratitude. And one of the lessons I am learning in this life on Latitude 18 is that the level of my insulation directly corresponds with the depth of my gratitude. If I surround myself with the comfortable and convenient, suddenly “they” start becoming much less important than “me.” If I choose to turn away, eventually my agenda dwarfs most everything else, and suddenly, I don’t have what I need to be comfortable or satisfied. When all I’m looking at is myself in wealthy America, I start feeling like I don’t have all that much to be grateful for.
Oh, but I do.
I have the freedom to stay home with my kids, when the women around me have never dreamed of the option. I have the money to eat. Every day. My kids sleep on beds, in a house, in safety. I have an education higher than most everyone on the planet, and I belong to one of the wealthiest nations in the world. I got to choose who I married {for love, even}, and I’ve always had clean water. But mostly, I know about Jesus, and I savor the Rescue.
But, when I insulate myself from those precious souls around me–both globally and locally–who have tasted poverty and suffering and abuse, I begin to forget how much my hands are really holding.
And I start to neglect giving thanks.
And I foster entitlement and discontent.
And I begin brush past the blind musician on my way to dinner, and
not feel anything, at all.
What are you most thankful for today? What ways can you “get closer” to those less fortunate around you?
I’m so thankful for Laura’s perspective today, because she doesn’t speak as someone who doesn’t know. She knows. And she sees. And so she testifies. Since she submitted this guest post, her words have been rolling around in my heart. I hope they roll around in yours, too.
Thank you for sharing your heart and the Love that compels you to serve. You have given me new perspective for my day! It’s so easy to lose sight that this life is not about me. I find the more I focus on myself the more I “want” and discontentment festers.
i’ve been to india and china for 15 days each trip.
she’s right. it’s not as romantic as some of the best missionary novels claim.
but. i’ve never been drawn so close to the heart of Jesus as when i was vulnerable on foreign land trying to love others more than i love myself while processing culture shock.
after 10 years in church ministry, and with a heart that explodes with love for other cultures…it’s hard to not want to pack my family of 5 up and head to india to be with our dear friend and her 47 children or head to china and immerse ourselves in the culture of our daughter’s birth country.
but. we are here…for now.
i can’t wait to head to her blog….thanks emily for sharing her with us.
Oh Laura your words are so filled with wisdom! I love this:
“And one of the lessons I am learning in this life on Latitude 18 is that the level of my insulation directly corresponds with the depth of my gratitude.”
This has been a year of focusing on being thankful for me. And I am reminded that I was made to praise Him for the simple things… that I tend to take for granted.
Thanks so much for sharing your heart. I clearly see Christ in every word!
stacey´s last [type] ..Prayer
*sniff, sniff* {choking back tears} That was just beautiful!!! How quickly we forget what we’re holding and let entitlement and discontent slip in… thank you for reminding us of what we truly have (and re-opening my eyes to the need)! We are TRULY blessed may we be a TRUE blessing! {tears falling now} Thank you for a good soul-cleansing cry. Love, Michelle
Btw, Emily… I always LOVE your blog when I visit!
Wow. What an amazing message. Thank you for reminding us of how much we truly have to be grateful for. What a blessing.
what beautiful words – I hope they linger in my mind longer than today … and tomorrow
Oh, Laura. This is so beautiful. My husband and I went to Cambodia for 10 days in July, and it rocked our world. I want to pack us all up (we have 3 girls–9, 8 and 4) and move there RIGHT NOW. I know God has some other stuff for us to do, but I’m hoping and praying that if he does call us there, we’ll jump without hesitation.
And I’m in complete awe of the things He’s been tossing across my path since we’ve been back (posts like these, etc). Wow.
Marla Taviano´s last [type] ..the people who share my dna
Starring this post in my reader. I’ve been complaining internally because I am tired and lethargic. It’s so true that this attitude comes from an ugly heart of entitlement.
Wow, it does make me think about my own complaints and what I need to really see. . .”in as much as you do to one of these, My children, you have done it to Me. . .” Thank you.
I needed this lesson. today. in the last hour. because i think i must have a black cardigan to start back to school next week. even though i didn’t have one last year and still managed to teach a year of 8th grade! thanks for the reminder that i have so so much for which to give thanks. peace in my home. water. food. clothing (sans a black cardigan, but that is okay). a house. education. health….
kendal´s last [type] ..summer unwrapped
Amen!
Thanks Laura, I can totally relate!
We live and work in Congo, and sometimes the need here is truly mind boggling. I have been tempted to give up and go home because I could never do ‘enough’. But even if we never accomplish one iota on our agenda, I am confident God has us here with a purpose in mind. And so many sunny days I take the gorgeous weather for granted. Despite the bugs, the poverty, the needs, the dirt, the stresses… I am loved. I have eyes to see the shining sun! And ears to hear the song of a bird in the morning. This too, is still part of our Father’s World. Press on sister!
Wow. SO good. Entitlement, discontent–so ugly. I’m so insulated. The level of insulation directly corresponds to the depth of my gratitude…I need to mull on that one awhile. Thanks for this post and giving us the benefit of a small look past our insulation.
dawn´s last [type] ..need to write
These words are precious and truth-filled. You are so right about the correlation between insulation and gratitude. And you said it so very well. Thank you!
Flower Patch Farmgirl´s last [type] ..Today Was Kindergarten Registration
Thank you, Laura, for being eyes and ears for me in places I’ve never seen or heard but need to. I won’t forget what you’ve shown me today.
I’m grateful for you.
Kristen-Moms Sharpening Moms´s last [type] ..On Schooling and Getting Over Mama Guilt
this is so true. The key is gratitude, not matter what, no matter where.
Beautiful and convicting. i loved this post!!
JoAnn´s last [type] ..Real Estate Attack- How I Almost Died from Embarrassment
thank you for this beautiful message. it has struck a chord in my heart and made many things run through my mind today.
I’m thankful I read this post today. Thank you for showing me with your eyes, ears and touch what it means to live without enough.
Michelle @ Graceful´s last [type] ..Entitled to Grace
I’m thankful for this gentle, poignant reminder – just when I needed it. Suffice it to say I’ve allowed discontent to seep in and blur my vision of all I have to be thankful for.
This was so beautifully written and such precious truth. Thank you Laura.
Linda´s last [type] ..Change
Welcome, Laura! I know you’re half-way around the world but I feel like you were writing this for my very insulated and ungrateful self still here in the land of freedom and convenience and abundance. It has been a day…and yet a cleaner, easier, healthier one than most of the world enjoyed. Gratitude is the key, you’re right…but it sure is hard to hold on to. Your words have challenged me in a good way and I thank you. Blessings to you and your family!
The Scooper´s last [type] ..All Systems Go
Oh I love this. As I’ve pondered my response to poverty, even as God isn’t moving me to move to a third-world country (not yet, anyway), I keep bumping into the importance of gratitude. I can give, I can reorder my priorities, I can pray, I can keep my eyes open.
But above all, I need to stay humbly thankful. It reshapes my heart.
Kelly @ Love Well´s last [type] ..Shes Not Cute Shes Teyla
Beautiful post and it really touched my heart. I try so hard to stay a “count my blessings” kind of person, but sometimes I stumble and grumble. It is humbling to think about the true heroes like Laura and her husband who really walk their talk and give from the heart. Thanks for the inspiration to try harder and take the time to give more where I am able.
doni´s last [type] ..Recycled Fence Picket Beach Signs
Hi Friends! This is Laura, and I haven’t had email access for a few days (dangit), so I hate that I haven’t left a comment sooner, but . . .
Emily, Thanks for letting me speak here, and thanks for the beauty you create on your site. It is such an encouraging, soul-space here that you have crafted.
I have loved reading the comments here, and I have loved that my lesson here sparked gratitude there. I have a friend who says that “Truth is slippery,” and isn’t THAT the truth? We know we need to be grateful and practice compassion, but so often that reality slips away and is replaced by the grumbling self that demands.
So I guess we are all still learning to hang on harder . . .
Thanks for the encouragement. So thankful to have spoken a bit here.
Laura
Laura@Life Overseas´s last [type] ..A Birthday Over at InCourage
How did you two find each other??? Emily, Laura was a friend of mine in college and a HUGE influence (for the Lord) in my life. Laura and her husband were the first real christian couple John and I ever knew and they really blessed us! I read her blog – and pass it on all the time. So glad you found each other! What a perfectly small world.
Shannon´s last [type] ..Fantastic Fireworks!
ohhh! This was such an amazing post! I.loved.it! Her honesty is so refreshing! Help us in America, God, to be grateful and understand all that we have!
Amanda Slade´s last [type] ..How I feel…