She told me not to touch the Jell-O as it settled in the fridge. It needed time. But I was only a little bigger than 7 and I just wanted a peek. The cherry red shined under the light of the fridge. Was it wet? Was it gel? One finger in, that’s all it took. One finger to discover if the magic had happened yet.
It hadn’t. And I found that out quick as I lost my balance, finger deep in red goo. It came tumbling off the glass shelf, onto the jam and the pickle lids, the linoleum and the pink jelly shoes. And the worst part? She was standing in the doorway to the kitchen, watching. And I didn’t know it.
There I was, unable to hide the sticky guilt of my disobedience. She could have yelled. She could have lectured. She could have scolded with a pointy finger and a go-t0-your-room. But that isn’t what she did.
Instead, she wore calm like a cloak as she moved towards me, a soft look on her face, love in her green eyes – mercy standing over me. And then, she began to help me clean it up – grace on hands and knees. The yelling would have been easier to take. But I would have forgotten it. This mercy of grace she offered when I deserved not-grace has stayed with me for 26 years.
When you know you deserve punishment but you are pardoned instead, gracious acceptance is the only response.
This is Day 4 of 31 Days of Grace. If you missed the beginning of the series over the weekend, you may want to scroll down to see the first 3 days. If you want to have Chatting at the Sky delivered right into your email inbox, click on subscribe and choosing the email option. Or you can just come back here each day. I like when you do that.
Looking for the other blogs hosting 31 Days Series? Here they are: Nesting Place, Balancing Beauty and Bedlam, My First Kitchen, Life With My 3 Boybarians, Reluctant Entertainer, The Inspired Room, Remodeling This Life.
i loved this – what a great portrait of grace
amanda´s last [type] ..seasons
Thanks Emily. I needed to read this more than you’ll ever know.
Donna
Funky Junk Interiors´s last [type] ..3000 Followers Event – The Colour Challenge linkup!
What a precious memory and picture of grace.
Mrs. Sojourner´s last [type] ..Sharing on Saturday- 31 Days
It’s not nice to make a pregnant lady cry at 6 a.m.
I love mercy and I love grace and I pray so much this picture of both stays with me when my littles reach for the jello.
Tracey´s last [type] ..Pregnancy Update-Due December 18
I need this. I know I’ve been handed moments like those. I need to hand them out more often.
Love.
Dear Lord. Please help me to remember this the next time the jello falls to the floor.
Amen.
Naomi´s last [type] ..BBB is 4!
emily,
thanks for this gentle reminder…
emily, this is so beautiful! mothers have such a unique opportunity to extend grace to the youngest and most tender souls. thanks for the reminder how important it is to handle the little disobediences, the little mishaps with grace.
tiny twig´s last [type] ..Guest Post on Community
I just wanted to tell you that this post touched my heart. Very beautiful! As I wipe the tear from my eye that you’ve inspired, I will go on with a renewed spirit and finish my day with grace. Thank you.
I am loving your 31 Days of Grace — thank you for taking the time and making the effort to bless us for 31 days! This is a beautiful story — and a good lesson about grace for this too-often-yelling mother.
Michelle DeRusha @ Graceful´s last [type] ..Keep Doing
Can totally picture that red goo. Bound by grace.
lara´s last [type] ..P31P- day 2
Wow! This is a powerful illustration of grace. It is challenging on so many levels. It challenges me to think about my response to people in my life. Am I giving grace? It challenges me to think about the grace that is LAVISHED on me by Jesus. Who has every right to take action on my disobedience, yet instead suffered the cross. Praying that God renews you each day as you share thoughts on HIS Grace with us! Thanks Emily!
Jess´s last [type] ..Sharing Links
I don’t know right now if I’m more humbled by the love of my savior or disturbed at the lack of grace in my own parenting…
Thank you.
Thanks, Emily. Thanks for writing about grace, and all its different faces and all the way it has invaded your own life. We love the reminders you are painting. Please keep painting them.
Laura@Life Overseas´s last [type] ..We Made Six Months!
I remember my mom being so gracious, too. (Was that your mom you wrote about?)
I can think of the many times that I’ve been gracious with my kids, but also the times I was frustrated and lost it. I always go back to them and apologize. Grace is something I need more of. And that is why I love coming here every day to read about it.
Thank you, Emily!
Sandy @ Reluctant Entertainer´s last [type] ..Day 2 Perfectionism- Learn More About Yourself
It definitely was my mom. I remember that day with such clarity.
emily freeman´s last [type] ..31 Days of Grace – day 4 my first glimpse
I had a similar experience. I was supposed to take my mom’s freshly baked cheesecake to the fridge in the basement where it would set and cool until her company came for a Christmas dessert. I couldn’t quite see and lost my footing. The cheesecake slid off the plate and splattered down the stairs to the basemet floor. I expected scolding. Instead my mother helped me clean it up. It’s a moment of grace and mercy I will never forget.
Imperfect´s last [type] ..Tomorrow We Run
Thanks for the reminder!! I think I saw you at the tag sale on Saturday – was that you?? It was crazy fun there!! You are a great writer!
Wendy {make it happen}´s last [type] ..Blog Design Services
My experience was the polar opposite and I find myself reading today’s entry and feeling the old anger again. My innocent attempts to help my mother in the kitchen were most often met with criticism, and if I broke, spilled, or made a mess – well, let’s just say mercy and grace aren’t words that could be used for her response. However, as I read your entry today I began to see someone else present in my memory pictures. I began to see a little girl, now grown up, abandoned by her own mother at the age of 5, never having experienced that same mercy and grace that my little heart and soul longed for. I began to see past who I’ve perceived to be the enemy for these more than I care to admit years to the REAL enemy – and now I can clearly hear the deceptive hiss. There’s also someone else in my memory pictures, too. Someone who IS grace and mercy. I never realized it at the time, but he was there with me – with both of us – all along.
oh, this comment. I know this is the story of so many. But I LOVE how your memory has brought up a deeper, more healing truth – that he was with you and extended grace to you in that thin place. I love this – thank you for sharing it.
What a lovely story and lesson and memory. It helps me remember the grace in every day life.
Carol´s last [type] ..Birthday
this is such a beautiful picture of Grace… I love it
Jenny´s last [type] ..Writing to Change the World
Lovely. I wish I would extend such grace on a more regular basis to those around me – particularly my own children. Thank you for the beautiful reminder.
Dianne´s last [type] ..a miracle
Well, it’s the second day in a row you’ve made me cry. Beautifully written.
Elizabeth´s last [type] ..Apple Pie
Beautiful. Thank you for this and yesterday’s lovely posts. They’ve renewed grace in my life. I look forward to this month’s journey.
I just love this. These are words I want ringing in my ears when the next mess is made and the next little one disobeys.
Flower Patch Farmgirl´s last [type] ..Ruby Just Because
thank you for reminding me of a different way to handle the mischief of my boys.
Mikelle´s last [type] ..a relaxing work trip
This is exactly what I’ve been working on since the disaster that was last week (our first week of our 6th year of homeschooling). Your words are eloquent and straight to my heart. Thank you, Emily.
I think lessons like this one of modeled grace should rank at the top of our own parenting goals and achievements.
Truly beautiful, Emily. Beautiful.
This is gorgeous. Thank you for reminding all of us that we have this available at any time, in any situation.
Lovely.
~Kolein
Kolein´s last [type] ..Sweaters to PILLOWS! Re- purposed!
Thank you for the memory…it makes me want to strive to be an example of grace to my children so that they can comprehend the grace from Christ
i can barely see your sweet hands because my eyes are so blurry. this was beautiful.
Melissa´s last [type] ..Carnival Time!
I’ve wandered over a few times, but this post may be the first I’ve actually read and gotten chills. Worded perfectly, this story is such a wonderful picture of grace in action. I hope I can remember that kind of love the next time I see jello being spilled (or the next time I am the spiller).
Annie´s last [type] ..oh- anthropologie
This is a beautiful post Emily.
Amy´s last [type] ..Childs Play
How very true!
Linda Long´s last [type] ..This Past Weeks Menu Plan
What a beautiful post. I think our children will remember more the times we didn’t “react” with anger, but responded with love.
Kirstin´s last [type] ..The Show MUST Go On
Emily, you know you’re going to need to compile this in a book. I am really enjoying this series.
I would like to tell you of a story this reminded me of … a story of a time God gave me grace for my mother. I had a wonderful mother and she taught me much about grace, but this particular time God taught me how to show grace to her. I was 17 and had made my prom dress, a flowered halter dress with a 12 inch deep, many yards long ruffle on the hem. Mother had taught me to sew and on this particular afternoon, she offered to help me press the dress. She touched the garment, which was made of a synthetic fabric, right in the front with a slightly too hot iron and left a slight but measurable impression of the entire iron plate on the front of the dress. She was devastated. The hormonal, quick tempered teen in me stepped aside right before my eyes and Christ in me stepped forward and instead of an iron mark, I saw my mother’s love on the front of my dress. I assured her it was ok and that it was barely noticeable due to the flowers and that I would wear the dress proudly. And I did. And I am still married to my prom date. I wish I had that dress right now, because I’d have another reminded of my mother … and God’s grace. Why I didn’t have some of that grace with my prom date tonight over the chopped peppers, I don’t know.
fantastic story, claire. thanks for sharing.
dawn´s last [type] ..something pretty- something meaningful- something gross- something fun
Too often, Piper gets my patience – my impatient patience – and I withhold my grace… I’d have been the lecturing, “I told you so” as I cleaned it up… I am the lecturing, “I told you so.” Sigh. I want to bawl.
Kelly Langner Sauer´s last [type] ..Joel & Chelsea – Battery Park Area- Charleston- SC
This just made me cry. Beautiful post.
I want to be that kind of mama. It is my heart’s prayer. And this entry reminded me why it is so important.
Amanda´s last [type] ..searching for my gratitude
My husband shows me that kind of grace so many times over and over…but the time I won’t ever forget is when I got into a car accident and totaled the car. He just took me into his arms and held me and let me cry. Not a word about the damage of the car. He said we would get through it together and that he loved me so much. I grew up in a family that didn’t offer grace…my previous marriage NEVER offered me grace…my amazing husband exudes grace…and it raises the standard I set for myself.
Wow! Your story was amazing…I am working on being that kind of mom. Thank you for sharing.
Mary Joy @Seeds of Encouragement Sewn with Grace´s last [type] ..Snacking or Feasting on the Word of God
oh, i so needed to hear this today. i was reading through the book “Grace-Based Parenting,” but during the move it somehow grew legs and vanished. thanks for the poignant reminder of the mamas we are called to be.
beautiful emily. how i hope I would respond similarly, but fear i wouldn’t. I have been forgiven so much…i should show mercy easily and as a reflex. I don’t.
Great post.
dawn´s last [type] ..something pretty- something meaningful- something gross- something fun
guess what emily? I had my chance to show grace this morning. posted about it on my blog. Isn’t it cool when you get to practice before you forget?
dawn´s last [type] ..something pretty- something meaningful- something gross- something fun
Emily, this is so beautiful! What a wonderful picture of grace!
When I was a kid I disobeyed my parents and ended up with a foot full of stitches because of it. I was terrified that when my dad got home I was really going to get it. Instead, he came home with a Barbie doll camping set and tons of mercy. Every time I mess up now, I remember my father’s grace and it reminds me that my heavenly Father has even more of that kind of grace to offer.
Bonita´s last [type] ..Ruthless
I had the chance to meet you at the garage sale this past weekend. Your sister was right, you are a fantastic writer. Great stuff!
This really spoke to me. Thank you.
so beautiful Emily. thank you.
Wow, all I can say is, wow…it is within my power to do so, but why don’t I extend more grace like that?
Thanks for sharing that beautiful story!
Melanie H.´s last [type] ..Our Summer in Pictures-Third Installment
grace. So simple. So HUGE.
With the simple story of red fingered goo I can easily list 10 exmples were grace was given…and 10 more where grace was longed for. Unconditional love. For me, the #1 lesson I want to teach. And, receive each day.
Thank you for the reminder, Emily.
DanaMc´s last [type] ..Dial-A-Baklava – Only a Phone Call Away!
So this explains it. I’ve often wondered what your mother was like–I’ve met her, and she’s a dear, but I’ve wondered what kind of parenting would have produced the two women that you and Nester are. This little story answers that question. In just a few words, you’ve painted a picture of the kind of mother I want to be. And I am so grateful that’s the kind of mother you had–for you are a treasure.
Love you.
Richella´s last [type] ..Show us your life- the dining room
AHHH! You’re killing me.
So much to think on. So much.
JoAnn´s last [type] ..My First Guest Post and A Place You MUST Go