Photographing weddings is perhaps the most stressful job on planet earth. And if the other planets had weddings, I’m sure it would be stressful there as well, what without the gravity to hold the guests down and all. I suppose brain surgeons and counselors and EMTs have pretty stressful jobs, too. But those wedding photographers. They’ve got a lot of pressure to capture perfect.
I’ve taken photos at a lot of weddings. Only once have I been the main photographer (an honor and a joy, but never again thankyouverymuchamen). I’ve spent a lot of time trying to figure out what it is I am fascinated by about a bride on her wedding day. And I think I’ve finally got it.
It’s because there is something magical about the way of a woman who knows she is loved.
She is captivating. Compelling. Inspiring. On that day, she and her love have gathered up all those in their world and they say to one another, I choose you. With all of your crazy mess, with all of your fears and worries, with all of your radiant beauty, I choose you — when you are sick and when you are well, when you are rich and when you are poor. I choose you, and only death will come between us. And even then, you’ll be my love.
People who know they are loved are moved to be lovers. People who are unloved cannot move at all.
Until we know we are loved and accepted, we will continue to hide, to stay safe, to hold our cards close to our chest, to keep our real selves hidden from the world. It’s why that boy sent you a note in 5th grade that said “If you like me, check yes or no.” Check yes, and I’m safe to move. Check no and I may be hurt but at least I’ve not risked much. If we don’t know we are loved then it is unsafe to love in return.
The ones who love best are the ones who are able to receive and embrace their own belovedness. We cannot give what we have not first received. I dare you to believe that you are seen by a God who says to you, I choose you. With all of your crazy mess, with all of your fears and worries, with all of your radiant beauty, I choose you — when you are sick and when you are well, when you are rich and when you are poor. I choose you, and not even death will come between us.
Change begins in the secret place of the heart. And so as we talk about what it means to influence the world, as we seek to understand what it means to make the best kind of change, as you sit there on the bathroom floor with your palms up, after grace comes by and fills your arms with gifts and blessing and fullness, know you are loved. There is singing going on, and it’s happening over you.
“The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing.”
Zephaniah 3:17
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This is the sixth post in a series. Read 31 Days to Change the World from the beginning. Go here to see all of the other 31 Day series happening around the internets. Want to have Chatting at the Sky delivered into your email inbox? Subscribe here for free.
Beautiful.
The first photo is stunning.
Your words are too, as always!
Love it. All of it.
I love this post; every word is true, especially these: hmmmmm….well, ALL of them! Thank you.
Em, I’ve never thought about a bride’s happiness being linked to being chosen…no matter the circumstances. Powerful story.
Now is the time to believe we are God’s beloved and to do whatever it takes to deepen that conviction until we feel like his bride.
And FYI, I hung four of your “thankyouverymuchamen” photos in my bedroom yesterday.
When we were first married I struggled with letting him love me – I just couldn’t believe he did as much as he said. I also didn’t/couldn’t understand God’s unconditional love for me. They’ve both been working on me the past ten years. And I’m slowly, slowly becoming a better lover – of my husband, of God, of my children.
Ahhh, beautiful! Thanks for the reminder that I am loved by the Ever Faithful One. When I was younger, I discounted His love, because I knew he loved everyone, but now I am in awe, because he loves even me. On another note, next week, we will celebrate our 25th wedding anniversary! God is so good!
Lovely . . . . just lovely!
Wow, this is so great. Thank you!
“I dare you to believe that you are seen by a God who says to you, I choose you. ”
Keep it coming.
that is so true. a woman who knows
she is loved can conquer the world
. . . and we are all loved.
Beautiful and inspiring~
So very beautifully said. We are so blessed to be chosen, by our loves and by our Lord.
So beautiful. I’m in a healing journey class right now with a group of wounded women. It breaks my heart to hear the evidence that several of them do not know the Truth you’ve written here. I may just have to pass your post on to them at the right time… blessings today, Emily.
Beautiful post. I couldn’t agree more. I have many people in my life who should be hearing this message.
Oh, I love this post, Emily! Sooooo much! It’s a book in itself!!! This truth is so lovely, so freeing, so life changing!
Palms are up. Listening. Come to think of it, my legs are getting stiff, sitting here on the floor, and I’m starting to feel like a pouty kid with a private little tantrum when there is so much waiting for me out there – on the other side of that door.
This is beautiful! For this very reason – something magical that day – that I am a wedding photographer (yes, stress). But there are no words for those beautiful, sentimental, and elegant glimpses of LOVE.
“People who know they are loved are moved to be lovers.” That is a grand and glad thing, and I’ve been learning it lately: how the safety of my Jesus’ love for me enables me to reach out and love without fear. Thank you for expressing it so beautifully.
Dang, First your book wrecked me. Now, this series…. I started as a participant in this 31-day series; turns out i’m in a season of learning to let Him and other’s love on me versus doing, volunteering and running…and, sometimes it’s your own little world that needs the most change, devotion of time, focus, and surrender.
Yay! I love this! I have really been enjoying this journey of changing the world with you!
Oh please do not stop with these posts. You are so right. This is a new-ish concept for me. I thought I got it. But I realized I didn’t really. We can’t give what we haven’t first received. Every day, I need the reminder of belovedness. It’s the only real place of safe.
Yes, Yes, YES!! Oh, Emily, what a wonderful post. Would that we all could rest in that knowledge and be set free to. . .well. . .to be free, for starters! The blessedness of knowing that we’re loved. Now that’s worth thinking about. Thank you for expressing this so beautifully with both your words and your photos. You amaze me, did you know that?
“I dare you to believe that you are seen by a God who says to you, I choose you. With all of your crazy mess, with all of your fears and worries, with all of your radiant beauty, I choose you — when you are sick and when you are well, when you are rich and when you are poor. I choose you, and not even death will come between us.”
BEAUTIFUL!
PS, so enjoying grace for the good girl!!
Beautiful. I was just a bridesmaid in my dear friend’s wedding this weekend. She walked a long, hard, painful road of singleness, and has been hurt a lot. I can tell you that on her wedding day, I thought more than once how a woman who is loved is amazing. You are right, there is something magical.
I was married last year, and as the poster above, I am having a hard time receiving all that love my husband has. I come from a broken family, and his way of loving is just revolutionizing my universe. And yes, allowing me to receive God’s love more and more.
Great series! Thank you.
Thank you, Emily. This is beautiful — gathering us all up in His stunning truth that seems too wonderful, too amazing, too glorious; but yet, we have faith, receive, and believe.
Hi Emily
My name is Cat and I am NOT a good girl…lol
but I love what you have to say about it and I have known alot of good girls in my life
it is my belief that every story should be heard, this way we will realize how un-alone we actually are!
I love your post today
It speaks to me of the truth of when we are well with ourselves all is well in the world, and what pleases the Creator more than his creations being well
keep up the amazing work!
love and light
Beautiful!
I know that when I believe that my Father, and my husband, loves as He/he says he does, I experience true freedom. Thanks Emily.
Brooke
Wow! Thank you so much for this today.
That’s been my struggle for years, but lately, I have learned so much about His love. Even when It’s hard to believe, and seems impossible, I will choose to believe His Word….This post reminds me of the story of Hagar when she gives God the name, “You are the God who sees me” (Gen 16:13).
This is a beautiful reminder for me. Only when I am surrounding myself with God, only when I am immersing myself in His Words of love, can I love anyone else with a perfect, unconditional sort of gift-love. Only when I am assured of God’s love for me can I be confident enough to love those around me regardless of what I gain in return. Thank you for this!
A resounding Amen – let it be so!
mmmm … love this post and your closing verse. Such precious love. And so precious to be so loved!
So well said, and such a beautiful reminder of God’s unconditional love for each and every one of us. Thank you!
BRAVO! BEAUTIFUL! AMEN!
This post ranks among my all time favorites.
A gift for my soul.
Thank you.
Loved this! So beautiful and so true. I know exactly what you mean.
Thank you!
I totally get this!
This post broke me. Isn’t it funny how certain words at certain times just hit our hearts and the tears start falling? Thank you. Some days I just need to be reminded…
Thank you, thank you. I struggle to grasp the truth of being beloved of God NOT for what I do, but for who I am.
Beautifully said. I needed this today! Thank you
Have you been peeking inside my heart today? You do not know how much I needed these words today. To know that I’ve been choosen by God, despite my faults and imperfections. Thank you!
I wanted to stop by to tell you that I bought your book today. I am not a huge reader and so often hesitant at “buying” books {I tend to see if I can get hooked on a library copy first!}. But at my Christian book store, there stood your book, under “best sellers.” And I was overcome for joy for you…a fellow blogger…seeing your book in real life right before me. So I opened up the pages to see if I would get hooked in…and I did. I think it was right about when you are talking about you and Nester fighting over a Barbie mask! I do not even know you Emily, but I feel so proud to “know” you through this online world. I am looking forward to your read. Thanks for inspiring and encouraging.
This one brought tears to my eyes.
Beautiful and just what I needed to hear this week! Thank you!