It wasn’t my intention to put a mustache on my car. The Man works with high school kids so he really got it for his. We left the toy store that afternoon, smiling as we carried out the giant magnet. But when we got home, it didn’t take long to realize there was no good place to put the stache on his car – the grill and the headlights and yadayada – so he stuck it on mine “just to see.” That was nearly a year ago.
At first it was funny but now I mostly forget about it until I’m sitting at a stoplight and people walk across the street in front of me and stare and laugh point. And I get all weird and throw up my hands, What?! and get defensive.
Until I remember I have a mustache on my car. And then I laugh, too.
For months, I’ve meaning to take it off. I mean, I’m not the mustache on my car kind of person, really. But then, I keep not taking it off. I started thinking about why and came up with five possible reasons. Maybe you need a mustache, too?
1. If you’re easily offended, it might be time to put a mustache on your car. Give them a reason to point and laugh, and then laugh with them.
2. If you think your car is too nice for the foolishness, it might be time for a stache. In this case, you might need to skip the magnet and go ahead and get the fuzzy one.
3. If you are taking yourself too seriously, put a mustache on it. It’s hard to be introspective and twisty in the mustache mobile.
4. If you are feeling lonely? Mustache. People aren’t threatened by a girl in a van with mustache. You will delight children and their parents. Your friends will recognize you coming from far away, so when they get close enough to wave, you’ll see them. No mustache and they won’t recognize you until you’ve already passed. Too late for the wave.
5. If you aren’t the mustache type, it’s time definitely time for a mustache. Things have become too predictable. Shake it up a little. Laugh at yourself. Be silly for no reason.
Have things become a bit too serious for you? What are some mustaches you’re embracing these days?