blog business | chatting at the sky

Weekend Links to chat about

February 26, 2011

The Relevant Conference :: Tickets go on sale at midnight EST on March 1. And that means on the east coast you have to stay up late on February 28th to buy them. So really, they go on sale February 28th really late at night. That always confuses me, the midnight thing. Is it today? Is it tomorrow?

Lara Williams Grace Story :: My friend in real life, Lara, tells a part of her story at Stacey’s place.

Carlotta :: I’ve recently discovered a lovely blog called Pastor’s Girl’s Ponderings. She takes beautiful photos, writes lovely words. And she is only 15. Oh – and I’m linking to her self-portrait challenge tonight because I just saw it and I have a photo of me and my big self up there at the top.

Stephanie :: Have you met Stephanie? She co-founded (in)courage with Holley Gerth, and now she has started her own business. She is a creative mastermind, and her passion is to help you bring out yours.

Sarah Markely :: says “conjuring desire where it has flown is almost an impossible task.” Her words on this are like water and yes.

Let me know if you plan to go to Relevant! I’ll be there too, and we can chat it up.

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my favorite art moments at blissdom ’11

January 30, 2011

We made it back from Nashville and I feel like I can’t continue posting normal until I tell you at least a little about our trip. It was lovely, and there was art. But I’m sure you’re not surprised about that.

Basically, Blissdom is a conference for people (mostly women) who share their business, life, heart, passion and/or art online through blogging. There are workshops about writing, monetizing, social media, criticism and lots more. This is my attempt to show you a bit without being excessive. And to say that because we’ve been talking about art around here lately, I couldn’t help but see the art in everything as I went through the weekend.

The art of being there :: When someone goes through something tragic, it is impossible to know what to say or how to be around them. There is a crazy voice that says we should be able to do something, but there is also a God voice that says to simply love. When we lean into the God voice, out comes art every time. It was simply a joy to be with Edie – to laugh and to cry and to simply be around.

The art of vulnerability :: One of the keynote speakers was Brene Brown, and she talked a lot about the beauty of wholeheartedness and the art of vulnerability. In a beautiful representation of that, my friend Ari read a post during one of the panel sessions that she wrote last year after she lost her daughter, Mabel. It demonstrated this art so beautifully. When we share our painful stories, it dislodges the fear a bit.

The art of loving :: He came with me on this trip because he had some business to do in Nashville. And so after a full day of laughing and chatting and connecting with women and eating chocolate, I got to come back to our room and there he was, and I was home.

The art of laughter :: We live all over the country and there are still some of the (in)courage writers I haven’t met in real life yet. But these girls are mothers, friends, sisters, daughters, and talented artists. And they know how to laugh. And love. And embrace their uniqueness. (Pictured here: Lisa-Jo, Holley, Jessica, Angie, and Jen).

taken by @GailHyatt and her iPhone

The art of Connecting :: We sat on the floor with our plates scattered about, and we talked about writing an dreams and fear. Shannan, Melissa, and Gail Hyatt were lovely and inspiring, and all the things you might imagine. This was one of my favorite moments of the weekend.

The art of being free :: The conference couldn’t have ended more perfectly. A secret flashmob erupted at the end of the keynote, and my sister and I and 90 others got to be a part of it. There is an art to trusting the process, to letting go, to being free. Below is a video so you can see how it all went down. This one isn’t the entire dance, but it gives a good picture for the emotion of it all. And that’s where the art comes in – not because of our mad skillz, but because of the heart. You’ll see. It was my favorite.

And if you’re dying to see more, here’s a link to an unedited version.

Filed Under blog business, inspired 53 Comments

3 things to do when they don’t like your art

January 20, 2011

“Unless you’re running for something that requires a unanimous vote, it’s a mistake to focus on the frowning guy in the back of the room…You’re on the hunt for sneezers, for fans, for people willing to cross the street to work with you. Everyone else can pound sand, that’s okay. Being remarkable also means being ignored or actively disliked.”

Seth Godin, on his blog last month

Sometimes your art gets rejected. And that’s good, because all art isn’t for all people. If it were, it wouldn’t be art, it would be Wal-Mart. For example, sometimes people stop reading this blog – I don’t just say that because it’s obvious, I say that because every time an email subscriber unsubscribes, I get an email about it. The subject line says “Unsubscription Notification for Chatting at the Sky” and then it tells me the email address of the person. I got one just this morning.

The first time I got one of these, I felt totally rejected. What am I doing wrong? Why are they going away?! And then I was tempted to email them and ask. And then I started to rationalize it. Oh, they’re just streamlining and decided to read in Google Reader so they unsubscribed to the email. Or Maybe they decided to read directly on the site now. Those things could be true.

But what is probably more true is that for some people, their time is better spent in some other way. And they don’t care so much what I have to say. So what do I do about that?

Actually, nothing. Or everything, depending on how you look at it. The job of the artist is not to convince people to like what they have created. The job of the artist is to create. Your creation could be words, paints, crafts, music. But your art is in no way limited to those things. Your art is any work you are passionate about. And your job is to be passionate, not to convince someone else to like you.

Remember, it doesn’t have to be personal. I can make it personal, and I did at first. And they may even mean for it to be. But the great thing about having a mind of our own is we get to decide what we let affect us. Instead of taking it personally, see it as a refining. The words I put out are an invitation to receive what I have to offer here. When people stop reading, it simply means they aren’t looking for what I have to offer. And that’s okay, because there are others who are. If I try to cater to a broader audience, then I am in essence trying to please those who have already said no thank you rather than serve those who are wanting more.

Work like an artist, but think like a hostess. When people don’t like the art, the artist keeps creating. She doesn’t change what she makes and what she loves just because someone doesn’t like it. She can’t change how she works, but she may have to change how she thinks. A hostess serves the people at her table. She looks them in the eye, she meets them where they are. She doesn’t spend her time distracted during the party in the next room, calling the people who RSVPd no. She issues the invitations, and then serves those who show up.

And since we’re doing this, if you are one who likes what you see here and want to make it easier to read, you can click here to have new posts from Chatting at the Sky delivered into your email inbox, or hit ‘subscribe’ in the top right corner of this page. Simply choose the “Get Chatting at the Sky delivered by email” option. You may also choose to read in a web based reader, like Google. Either way, if you subscribe and then change your mind and unsubscribe, I won’t take it personal.

Filed Under a writer, blog business, inspired 90 Comments

chatting at the sky on facebook

August 25, 2010

I shared on my Facebook page that I cried during The Dog Whisperer last night. I know. What is happening to me? I guess that dog is working his way in. All that to say, I now have a Facebook page for Chatting at the Sky. I’ve had it for a few weeks, but haven’t really told you about it.

I’m trying to keep my personal profile personal as there is a lot of identifying information on there and I’d like to keep my kids names private from the blog. So, I thought it was time to separate the two. If you’d like to keep in touch on Facebook, you can like Chatting at the Sky here. And the dessert has nothing to do with anything, but doesn’t it look good? It’s from a date night a few months ago. That was a good night.

I’ve been weepy today as the girls are off to school and we saw their kindergarten teachers from last year in the hallway and they were nervous/excited/happy and a mama just gets weepy on the first day of school just because. And the dog just broke a lamp. How does a dog break a lamp? By being an animal in the house, that is how. I’m gonna go find me some dessert.

The winner of Marybeth Whalen’s book The Mailbox is Heathalee of Butterfly Genes. Congrats! I sent you an email so check your inbox. Aren’t free books the best?

Filed Under blog business 21 Comments

this week

August 7, 2010

If you happen to see this over the weekend, it is in the very small window of time when my blog is not being worked on. The lovely Lisa B. is doing some maintenancey things behind the scenes. And there are a few other things and some stuff I’m wanting to take care of this week, things that involve my brain and thinking and junk like that.

So, I am taking a seven day break from writing here. The fun news is, there will still be chat-worthy content posted, as I will have a guest post every day, including Tuesday for Tuesdays Unwrapped. After this week, I’m basically done publishing guest posts except for one or two. I have so enjoyed getting to know some of you and sharing this space with you this summer.

I will still be hanging out on Facebook and Twitter, so if you don’t follow me there this could be a good time to do so. I just joined the club and finally have a page for Chatting at the Sky on Facebook, so if you want to like me there, please do. In fact, you might be the first if you head over there because, you know, I don’t know what I’m doing yet.

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conference brain-drain

August 2, 2010

Home from Charlotte, it will of course take me about a week to process through She Speaks in my head. I will say there was graciousness and loveliness exuding from the pores of the women in my session for which I am eternally grateful.

I took exactly 9 photos the entire weekend and one of them was of me with these two sweet things. Emily is on the left and Brittany, the right. Emily has already been able to process some of what she’s been learning and it is worth a click over to check her out. These two are both super cute and I almost believed I was their age for at least one meal.

My editor Andrea Doering spoke in my session as well, and she had great things to say about what editors are looking for when they listen to authors pitch their books. I think her perspective was really helpful and I would love to share some of the things she and I shared in our session. Just not today. Today is re-entry day.

And let me tell you, I need a re-entry day because conferences? They suck the smart right out of me. Do you ever find that when you get around people, you do really weird things that you would never do in a normal situation? Take this for example:

This is me and Mary DeMuth. You know, the one I want to be when I grow up? Well. There I am with Mary and what do I have in my hand? A book Mary wrote? No. A book someone else* wrote. But inches from the book someone else wrote is the book that Mary wrote. Not just any book, her memoir book. Her beautiful, redemptive, difficult-but-worth-it read, Thin Places. Now, I already have a copy, so I’m thinking Oh, I’ll leave that for someone else. But hello? There is Mary. WITH A PEN IN HER HAND. Ready to sign a copy of her memoir. And I could have been all Hey Mary, I’d love to have a signed copy of your memoir because that is all kinds of awesome. But no. Instead I have to put me and my big self and someone else’s big book right next to her and get a photo. And not get a book. Because I was under the influence of conference brain-suck. In my defense, I had just finished teaching my session and I had no common sense left up there. But still.

So if you ever go to a conference and you get the chance to have one of your favorite writers sign their memoir, don’t sit next to them with someone else’s signed book in your hands and get a photo without getting a signed copy of their book. Especially when the books are free. Did I mention that?

Thank you all for your words of support and encouragement. I was blessed to be a part of such a great conference and now I’m also feeling blessed to be home. So come back tomorrow for Tuesdays Unwrapped, my favorite day of the week. After being away, I’m seeing those moment-gifts more clearly. It’s true what they say about absence and the heart.

*Christa Allan‘s book is the one I’m holding (Walking on Broken Glass) and I look forward to reading it!

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48 hours

May 25, 2010

The blog has been down for nearly 48 hours. I know. It was something about a server and a host and a gobleneckyhohaha. I don’t know. Translated that means uh, oh. I hope it’s not gone forever. It isn’t. Yay. But because it was down, I had no access to it at all. Not the dashboard, the drafts, my cpanel. Nothing. So I’m playing catch up this morning, and it’s Tuesday. I plan to have Tuesdays Unwrapped up today, hopefully by 10 am EST. Come back and link up then!

Filed Under blog business 9 Comments